Films..I do love me some films(had a bit of an edit)

I had a sudden realisation last night about the films that really affect me….most of them are about mental health in one way or another and always have been since before I realised I had any problems.

Donnie Darko, Sucker Punch, Psycho, The Chair, Memento, Pi, Black Swan, Stir of Echoes,One flew over the cuckoos nest, Girl interrupted, Fight Club, Seven, Sunshine, Pandorum, Me, myself and Irene, The Truman show, P.S I love you

Sucker punch...proof you can be strong and crazy at the same time
Sucker punch…proof you can be strong and crazy at the same time

The themes of these range from grief to full blown psychosis and in every one of them I can find a part of myself, some more than others.

I was watching Black Swan last night because my mum brought it back after I had lent it to her. Oh my…I must have done that in one of my weird moods because when I was thinking straight there is no way I would have told her to watch it! I just hope she never realises that the reason that part of me wanted to lend it to her is because well…it might help her to understand what’s going on in my head sometimes and why.

Black Swan at the height of her episode
Black Swan at the height of her episode

Yes it made me remember yet again that the relationship I have with my mother is not healthy. Not all the time but there are those moments that if I was watching from the outside I would pull myself away and tell her where to go.

I honestly don’t know where I’m going with this post other than to get it down on ‘paper’ and try to make sense of the feeling I have in my gut that I should pay more attention to the problems that I have.

I’ve been trying to be mindful of thoughts going on in my head and ignoring the ones that I can, challenging them when possible and telling them where to go when I know that I have no reason to let them linger. It’s difficult but I’m trying and will have to do some research on techniques for it that may help me.

Donnie Darko...excellent film that never fails to move me
Donnie Darko…excellent film that never fails to move me

I watched Donnie Darko this morning, Butterfly effect this afternoon and now onto Girl Interrupted and making sure I don’t get too immersed in them. I know if I do I will completely zone out and end up spending the rest of the day in a very weird mood. I love these films as I do most of the ones in the list…but I do have to be careful when I watch them.

Girl Interrupted, the film closest to my heart and most likely to trigger me at the same time
Girl Interrupted, the film closest to my heart and most likely to trigger me at the same time

If you’ve ever been in a mental institution of any kind there are a few of these that you will, like me, be able to connect with personally. Luckily my experience of being on a psych ward last time was nothing like it is in the movies, less screaming, less people attacking the nursing staff and a lot less forced medication.

But Girl Interrupted is about a girl with Borderline personality disorder, I watched this before my stay and sort of diagnosis and I remember thinking…’I’m like her, so glad I didn’t end up in a hospital!’ haha spoke too soon! Just like her I never had the diagnosis explained to me and couldn’t help thinking ‘so what does that mean?’ and still do.

We can learn a lot from films, sometimes to our credit and sometimes to our detriment, but there is a lot to learn. That we’re not alone being the least of those lessons.

If you’ve never watched any of these…well I’d recommend them though beware of the triggers they may contain!

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4 thoughts on “Films..I do love me some films(had a bit of an edit)

  1. Many of these are close to my heart also, but I’ll have to look at some. (Donnie Darko – Mad World – best song EVER! And Girl Interrupted affected me in much the same way as you))
    That feeling of not being alone that these films can illicit, validation of ourselves, I think this is so important – even if it can be heartbreaking at times.
    It’s a bit like our blogging, sometimes I question my own, but I look at others blogs like yours, and get so much from reading about how others cope (like this post), and have to trust that even when my own writing is bleak, it may help someone if they identify with the words.
    Okay, a trip to the video shop may be on the cards!
    Thanks for this Beautiful One. xox

    1. Some of them are ‘I think I’m crazy oh wait no I’m not it’s something paranormal’ type films but still make me feel better lol. I can see the mental health problems in any film now even ones that aren’t supposed to be about it 🙄 😆
      I think we all trust to that idea….speaking about mental health both bad and good can only help ourselves and others suffering with it.
      Love and peace to you Elyn, as always you reminded me why I post things like this 🙂 xx

  2. This is such a great post, I love 99% of those films you mentioned here, and I began to see that correlation too. I wrote an article last week about how these type of films were a result of a universal fear of the year 2000. I think we would have much more of this type of cinema if it wasn’t for the effect of 9/11.

    If you wanna read it, it’s here: http://dharmajunk.com/2012/12/28/millennium-meltdown-how-dream-films-shaped-the-world-1999-2001/

    Great analysis of these films you did here!

    1. Ohhh sounds intriguing I’ll have to go and have a look, it’s amazing how films can be analysed so many different ways. My old English teacher would be proud of me for putting that lesson into practise on here lol.
      Thank you I’m glad you liked it 🙂

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