numb and in pain…a conundrum

I’m in the middle of a dichotomy, numb and in pain at the same time…tis very confusing.

My mind is numb, not happy, not sad just….meh yet my body is in pain. Usually being in pain means that my mood plummets and together with my body it sinks to the bottom of that black hole. Now don’t get me wrong I would rather be meh than so low that all I can think of is…darkness, but will my body and mind ever stop confusing me?

I’ve woken the past few days with tension headaches and they have not gone away, the muscles in my neck and shoulders feel like someone has injected steel into the muscles from below my shoulder blades all the way up to the top of my head and into my jaw.

Stretches do nothing but hurt, heat packs sort of help but there’s only so many times I can shove it back in the microwave and I think I burnt my shoulder with it last time 😦 I just want them to piss off! There is no reason for them to be this painful! I’m not stressed out, I’m not at work so why the hell would they be doing this to me?!

I have no idea whether it’s MS related, psychological or something else that I don’t know about (the hypochondriac in me can’t help wondering about things like fibromyalgia) I don’t care what’s causing it I just really wish it would stop.

I have to go to training at work tomorrow, yes you heard right I have to go to training during my holiday, I hate it I do and I really wish I could tell them where to go! I want just one holiday where I get the full week off, no interruptions, no work, no nothing but that never happens and I’m sick of it!

Writing is not exactly easy at the moment, commenting is problematic and I’ve had to make myself turn on the computer. If I disappear for a couple of days that will be the reason, I think I might need to take some time off from the blog as well as everything else. Since I have WP on my phone I should be able to do some little bits but it will be limited if I don’t turn on my laptop.


11 thoughts on “numb and in pain…a conundrum

    1. I think your wish must have been granted, it wasn’t agony this morning just a dull ache and it’s stayed that way most of the day. The pain is threatening to come back but hopefully it will stay away. Thank you hun, for the kind words and the big smiles πŸ™‚ xox

  1. Oh, i am sorry that you are suffering right now. Have you tried a nice long hot bath? I hope you feel better by the time you have to go to training. My prayers are with you sweety xx

    1. I’d tried a bath, shower, heat pads, sleeping in both lying down and sitting up positions…nothing worked. Luckily this morning although there was an ache it wasn’t so bad. They’re still threatening to do it again but seem to be behaving themselves. Thank you hun πŸ™‚

    1. It was ok, took a while to deice the car and it was starting to snow as I headed home. I just can’t make myself be motivated…not good since I apparently started a long distance learning course today when I thought it was just a 2 hour training session πŸ™„ Toby will keep me warm, we’ve been having plenty of cuddles πŸ™‚ xxx

  2. Sorry you’re under the weather. I do hope you feel better by now. It’s terrible that one thing seems to compound another. Sometimes it’s just overwhelming. Take good care of yourself.

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