waiting another 8-10 weeks
two bloody months
two more bloody months on top of the two months I’ve already waited to speak to someone
how can they expect me to keep going?
I’ve booked to see a GP next week but…I’m spiralling down that pit
faster and faster the darkness is growing as I slide down that slope embedded as it is with spikes of pain.
I hate it. I hate myself. I hate my life. It’s like a jigsaw puzzle made of anguish, as each piece slides into place the picture of horror in my mind becomes clearer and the end shows its horrible face.
It took three phone calls to find out what the hell was going on and after the third the tears began. They stopped quickly for which I should be grateful but…in their place I’ve been left with a hollow in my stomach and a pain in my head.
How could they? how could they make me wait for so long? I told them this was coming and they can’t have heard me. I told them it was happening and yet still I’m made to sit here, alone, with only my own voices to listen to and they are evil.
I need to scream. I need…..I have no idea what I need.